Saturday Movie Review – “Abbott and Costello Go To Mars”

People who think they can judge the quality of a movie
by the stars rather than the directors need to watch
this immediately after watching Abbott and
Costello Meet Frankenstein
.

Cast, Crew, and Other Info

Bud Abbott as Lester

Lou Costell as Orville

Mari Blanchard as Allura

Written by D.D. Beauchamp, Howard Christie, and John
Grant

Directed by Charles Lamont

Complete information is available from the
IMDB
.

Buy from: Amazon.com
or Amazon.ca

Past movie reviews can be found here.

Premise

Abbott and Costell accidentally hijack a spaceship and
take it to New
Orleans and Venus. At no point do they reach Mars.

High Point

The casting of the Venusians. Yes, this movie is so
light on any
substance whatsoever that the best part of it was the
casting of the
Miss Universe contestants as the residents of Venus.

Low Point

The three biggest problems with this science fiction
comedy aren’t
really specific points, but are rather pervasive
issues throughout the
flick. They are:

  1. The “science” in this “science” fiction comedy is
    completely
    incorrect. This is not uncommon.
  2. This science fiction “comedy” is not funny in any
    way, at any
    time.
  3. Abbott and Costello do not, in fact, go to
    Mars.

The Scores

This does not feel original. It feels like
the tired schtick
of two comedians who’ve been at this for decades, but
who don’t have
anything better to do. The lead players just seem
tired of doing
this, and it comes across that way on screen. All of
the wit and
inventiveness we saw in Abbott and
Costello Meet
Frankenstein
(part of the same DVD collection) is
gone, and has
been replaced with physical abuse and chauvenism. The
villains are
ripoffs of Abbott and Costello, and Bud and Lou
weren’t even the first
“tall and skinny/short and chubby” comedy duo out
there. I give it 2
out of 6.

The effects sometimes hold up. In the
context of 1953,
they’re actually pretty good. I give it 4 out of 6.

The story is impossible, implausible, and
mostly
uninteresting. The actions of the heroes were just
plain moronic,
making the leads in Dumb and Dumber look
intelligent.
Screwball comedies always depend to some degree on
coincidence and
misunderstanding, but there’s absolutely nothing
else

involvied in propelling this plot forward. It’s just
terribly
written. I give it 1 out of 6.

The acting was awful. The leads seemed
tired, the villains
in the Abbott and Costello archetypes couldn’t act,
and most of the
Venusians weren’t trained actresses. I listed Mari
Blanchard in the
credits above, not because she had a significant role,
but because she
was the only person on screen who could actually
deliver a line. I
give it 1 out of 6.

The emotional response is terrible. The
movie is just flat
and boring. It’s not funny when it tries to be, but
is not yet so bad
that it’s funny when it doesn’t want to be. I give it
1 out of 6.

The production was on part with the rest of
the movie.
There was poor disguising of the stunt doubles brought
in to replace
stars too old for pratfalls. There was completely
uninteresting
lighting and camera work. The Venusian and rocket
ship sets looked
alright, but they were even flawed. (The cockpit is
designed to
rotate, and yet gravity is the only thing that keeps
the helmets in
place?) I give it 2 out of 6.

Overall, this is a bad movie, which is not
recommended. Get
the set for Abbott and Costello Meet
Frankenstein
, and
pretend this movie isn’t even included in the package.
I give it 1
out of 6.

In total, Abbott and Costello Go To Mars
receives 12 out of 42.

Next Month

In January, you can expect to see reviews of
Abbott and Costello Meet The Invisible Man,
Butterfly Effect, Clash of the
Titans
, and A Clockwork Orange in that
order as the weeks move on.